This article is reposted with credit to Rainbow Migration UK. We encourage you to read the original story in full on their website.
My name is Murtaza* and I am a gay man from Pakistan. My boyfriend Ali* and I were in a relationship for 7 years before we left Pakistan. We always wanted to live as a couple, but it was never possible there. Before we left, I was the director of my own company where he worked as a manager. We were able to travel to different countries for business, but also spend quality time together which was only possible abroad.
When his extended family found out he was travelling with me, they became very suspicious. After we came back from a long trip, they started questioning why I was spending so much money and giving these opportunities to my boyfriend but not any of the other managers. They started harming Ali and his family.
When I had a chance to come to the UK for a meeting a few months later, I wanted to take Ali with me as usual. His family stopped him and told him that people were talking about us and it would give a bad impression for him to go with me. Ali didn’t listen to them and told them he was going with a different director instead. When we were in the UK, his family found out that he lied and he was here with me, his boyfriend. They started threatening us, saying “If you come back, we will not spare you. We will kill you. We’ll make an example of you because you are giving a bad name to the family, the country and the religion.”
“When we were in the UK, his family found out that he lied and he was here with me, his boyfriend. They started threatening us, saying “If you come back, we will not spare you. We will kill you.””
I had already known about Rainbow Migration because I used to search online for organisations who may be able to help, even when I was still in Pakistan. When we started receiving the threats and knew that we could not go back to Pakistan, I emailed Rainbow Migration for information and they replied straight away. Within a couple of hours, Ayesha [Rainbow Migration Legal Services Manager] called me and guided me through the entire process, what’s going to happen and how to apply for asylum if we’re in fear of persecution, and encouraged us to apply if we think our life is in danger. We followed her advice exactly and called the Home Office, who arranged the initial interview after 3-4 days.
My boyfriend had a substantive interview just over a year after we first claimed asylum, while I had to wait about 18 months. We were both granted status shortly after the interviews. We had a lot of evidence because we had already been in a relationship for 7 years by the time we applied for asylum. We had pictures together throughout our relationship, back in Pakistan and in different countries, and evidence that we travelled together. Since coming to the UK, we have been living together. We were out and always looked after each other.
It was very frustrating having to prove my sexuality. In the final interview, the immigration officer asked my why it’s important for me to live as gay. I asked her why it’s important for her or anyone else to live as straight. If it’s important for a straight couple to live openly, then it’s our right to live as an open couple as well. These questions should not be there in the first place – they would never ask a straight person this.
Rainbow Migration was very helpful because they referred us to pro bono lawyers. Ayesha kept following everything that was happening, and Zehrah was very nice and helpful as well. She used to run the online Asylum Advice Sessions and reply to my emails. I had a very good experience with Rainbow Migration. If Rainbow Migration was not there, [getting refugee status] would not have been possible in our case.
Before Rainbow Migration referred us to pro bono lawyers, I spoke to a couple of lawyers but they were not interested in the case. They were only after money. The only people who were willing to help were asking for £7,000 which we could not afford, and it was very hard to find legal aid. I left everything back in Pakistan, I had no money and we were only surviving because our family and friends were supporting us for basic necessities.
“It was very frustrating having to prove my sexuality. In the final interview, the immigration officer asked my why it’s important for me to live as gay. I asked her why it’s important for her or anyone else to live as straight.”
It was very frustrating waiting over a year while we were not allowed to work. We are really lucky that we had some savings and family and friends who supported us, so we did not live in government accommodation. I’m very grateful to them for helping us, but I feel guilty that they had to spend the money. I had no other choice. People seeking asylum should be given decisions faster and allowed to work and support themselves. Many people don’t come from wealthy backgrounds and don’t have people to support them, so they have to survive off less than £200 a month, which is not enough to do anything.
It’s really frustrating to hear the comments about people seeking asylum. People come here for protection, when they are not safe in their countries. Personally, I had a very well-off life in Pakistan, and we only came to the UK to live as a couple. I didn’t even tell anyone here was seeking asylum. I’m sure many others are in the same situation.
Now that I have refugee status, I am doing some online work and my partner is learning English and working as a delivery driver. I have a lot of experience but I have not been able to find a job yet, as everywhere I apply says I am overqualified or I need experience in the UK. The other difficulty that we are facing is that we are limited in the countries we can travel to, and their different rules for people with travel documents than passports.
I’m glad that I’m in a safer environment and that Ali and I can live as a couple – that’s the most important thing. Still, even though it’s very safe here, I still see that some people are unhappy or annoyed when they see us together, but not when they see straight couples. We came all this way, but if there are a lot of people, I hesitate to show affection to my boyfriend. I hope that will change soon.
*Names have been changed to protect the identities of the interviewee and his partner.
In Pakistan, gay couples often face:
- Discrimination in workplaces, schools, and healthcare.
- Stigma that isolates them from community and family.
- Threats of violence, including harassment, assault, and in extreme cases, death at the hands of the state or family members.
These realities make stories like Murtaza’s resonate deeply with our community. They remind us of the urgent need for safe spaces, advocacy, and solidarity.
At PridePakistan.org, we stand with those who continue to resist oppression and fight for dignity. We thank Rainbow Migration UK for sharing Murtaza’s story and for their ongoing work supporting LGBTQI refugees and asylum seekers.
